What if Flight is Fight?

I was in a session once and I had a client who told me, “I have no fight in me, only flight.”

And I said, “What about if flight is fight?”

She said, “What do you mean? Tell me more.”

And I said:

“In some situations, taking flight makes sense. Fighting a lion isn't prudent, nor is it safe.

In some situations, taking distance — like moving out of a parent’s home — might improve the situation. Or taking a break in a heated argument allows space to reflect on your own and your partner’s emotions.

Maybe it’s not about having fight, maybe it’s not about having only flight. Maybe it’s about recognizing which situation requires what.

It’s not about running away; maybe it’s about being able to come back, to repair, to reconcile, to meet in the middle, to clarify, to understand.

Maybe it’s not about the conflict; it’s about the recognition.

Maybe it’s not about fight or flight; maybe in some situations flight is fight, and fight is flight.

It’s only about knowing when.