There’s a quiet but powerful story many of us have absorbed about relationships — often without realizing it: If I do the right thing, I will be loved. If I’m nice, she’ll kiss me. If I buy her a beer, she’ll sleep with me. If I listen long enough, he’ll stay. If I perform well, I’ll be chosen. At first glance, these sound like harmless social scripts. Underneath, they reveal something far more corrosive: transactional relation rooted in conditional love. Where Transactional Relating Comes...

I was in a session once and I had a client who told me, “I have no fight in me, only flight.” And I said, “What about if flight is...

Millions of people are right now sitting on their couch watching Netflix feeling isolated and lonely. In a world that considers itself...